12/14/2012 10:43

Being Right

I usually want to be right.

I was a little bit proud of myself 50 months ago (before the 2008 Presidential election) when I spoke about "the end of Obama's first term" knowing that I was right about what would happen. I was right again this year about his second term. When I know of people who are terminally ill, I am a bit conflicted; I don't wish for them to die, but I want to be right about their illness. When I invite someone to have lunch, I'd like to know that they will want to accept.

There is an advantage to being wrong sometimes. When you are wrong you have an opportunity to learn, to refine and correct your picture of the world, and to become not merely more often right but more completely right about actual reality. Being right, in contrast, is stagnant and provides no opportunity to become better than you are.

Nevertheless,I usually prefer to be right. Learning from errors is all very well, but being right confirms and solidifies my model of how the world really works. Being right means that I can leave one topic and confidently proceed to consider something else.

When I make plans for lunch -- seldom enough; lunch is usually a solitary, ad hoc enterprise -- but if I do make plans for lunch with someone, we can enjoy food and conversation together. But if they decline, I am forced to toss out my plans and begin again, reduplicating my effort. Worse, I must also analyze where my understanding of the other person and that person's situation was mistaken: An opportunity for an improved model but at a cost which I was not expecting to pay.

When Obama wins the elections for President, I know that I am not so estranged from everyone else that I can't see what's going on in the nation. And that's important to me, because I am a citizen here and have responsibilities.

When the sick person dies, I can be sad for the loss and still be glad that I know something about how life and death work in actual reality. And that is important, because -- no matter how much I allow myself to become deluded -- actual reality is where I live.

I overreach when I'm proud that I anticipate an outcome which is close enough to what really happened that I can claim that I was right about the future. I'm not usually so perfect in my prediction that there is nothing mistaken in it. I am both wrong and right; I both gain confidence in my view of life and find opportunity to refine my understanding of how things work.

I am eager for a deeper and more certain understanding of actual reality, and so I am happy to discover those places while my model of reality is not yet complete -- so long as those opportunities for improvement don't come too often, or at those times when I've invested heavily in my predictions, or when my attention has already turned to other matters. Every once in a while, am grateful for an opportunity to learn from my mistakes and to grow in understanding.

But I usually want to be right.


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